When referring to the whole of a person, most people say “body, mind, soul.” I chose a different order and changed soul to spirit when I named my blog. For me it’s always been “Mind” first. My mind is tugged in different directions depending on how my body and spirit are feeling on any given day. And frankly, I like the word spirit better. We tend to describe a person’s mood in terms of their spirit, rather than their soul. You know, we say things like, “She’s good-spirited,” or, “I’m in good spirits today.”
The connection between these three important facets of a person are fascinating to me. I’ve always been the kind of person to over analyze any situation to the point of giving myself a headache. My mind can work overtime, to the point of extreme mental exhaustion. Any one else? Let me see a count of hands…raise them high! ✋?
When my body is not firing on all cylinders (which is often– I’ll explain more in a later post), my spirit plummets and my mind gets to be like this scribbled mind.
Does this happen to you, too? One thing goes out of balance and it sets the mind down a path of irrational thoughts and then it drags us down the rabbit hole of anxiety. When this happens to me, I find myself needing a good deep breathing session. (Speaking of deep breathing, do you have any favorite apps to help you? I like these apps: CALM and Relax Melodies. Feel free to share your favorites by leaving a comment! If you don’t have an app you like, feel free to check out calm.com and/or the Relax Melodies app! I especially love the Relax Melodies when I need help falling asleep.)
So that’s why I named this blog The Place where Mind, Body, and Spirit meet.
My sister’s favorite word is BALANCE. I love that word. Balance: All aspects of life working in perfect harmony. Balance. It sounds like a delightful place to be. But achieving it? Next to impossible.
In recent years, however, I’ve come to think of balance as a temporary state; much like happiness. I love Alanis Morissette’s take on happiness. You can watch a clip from her interview with Oprah Here
I love Alanis’s perspective! In the same way as happiness is one of many emotions we experience along the journey of life, it’s unrealistic to MAINTAIN. So many people say they want to BE HAPPY. They become upset, disheartened, and depressed once the happiness ebbs and brings stress, confusion, disappointment, and sadness. They feel as though they’ve failed. And I believe that it’s the shame of failure (perceived or real) that leads to negative emotions, depression, anxiety, and an overall sense of imbalance.
While mind, body, and spirit are all connected, it’s difficult to navigate daily life, let alone maintaining that perfect balance of self-care and obligations to other people, places, and things.
I’ve found that just acknowledging that I can’t expect perfection from myself can lessen the stress I put on myself. I’ve learned to extend myself the grace I’d offer a friend who was struggling with the side effects of perfectionism.
We hear things like this all the time: Be kind to one another. Choose kindness. We are encouraged to perform random acts of kindness.
Why? Because kindness, thoughtful gestures, a smile, or even a simple “hello” while passing a stranger on the street, feel good! They feel good to give. They feel good to receive.
You know what? We often think of these kind gestures, smiles, and friendly words as things to be given to others. That’s right. We give kindness away to our family, friends, co-workers, and random strangers. But here’s the thing: WE CAN EXTEND ALL THOSE THINGS TO OURSELVES!! When a friend speaks soothing, caring, words, we feel calmer, safer, and loved. Just imagine if you spoke kindness to yourself instead of berating yourself. Just think if you allowed yourself that kind gesture of grace when you’ve slipped up. Just picture a world where we were not only a little kinder to each other, but to ourselves. We’d feel calmer, safer, and loved….and more balanced.
I’ve been practicing this technique for about 15 years. Sometimes it’s easy; sometimes it is not. But I’m mindful of it and the more I practice it, the more natural it feels. And the better I feel, mind, body, and spirit. Because in the end, it’s all connected. And I feel better when these three parts– mind, body, spirit– are in balance.
Until next time…..Christine ?